Through the eye of a lens

"When you photograph people in color you photograph their clothes"

"But when you photograph people in black and white, you photograph their souls!" 

(Ted Grant)

Me and my "tikus"

I like mouse, I find it quite adorable. 

My first pets were baby mice, my dad "accidentally" killed the mother, so I kept the babies.A friend of mine wanted to see them but she warded off my hand and ran away screaming, splatt! goes the babies. Then when I was in matriculation, I took care of my friend's white mice (bear in mind she was science major). At first it was only two, then someone left a bunch of them in front of my doorstep with a note, "Please take care of them, thank you". So I had more than 6 mice. I have to go back one weekend, and I left them with a friend, who later told me, a cat ate my mice, and all she can see was a tail dangling from the cat's mouth. In my previous workplace I was the one who will catch the mouse while most of my colleagues would be standing on the chair screaming. Today, my sister screamed so loud, that I rushed down to see, she was pointing at a not so dead mouse. I picked it up and put it back in the drain.  

Before the commotion I was chatting with my friend, after putting the mouse away I continued my conversation, and she asked me

Kak Zack : "Ade lecturer English tak?"

Naz          : "Aah, ada tikus"

Kak Zack : ??????????????

"Mouse..mouse..here, mouse..mouse..there, mouse, mouse, everywhere...." hehehehehe

I cried

I was browsing my own facebook albums, then I clicked at an album with pictures of happy moments, smiling faces. I smiled at the comments, and suddenly I felt tears trickling down my cheeks.At times I contemplated of deleting the album, even unfriend her on facebook, but some many times I found myself looking at her facebook wall, with people commenting how much they miss her. 

I still kept all her facebook messages, this year July would mark 1 year of her passing, she passed away 10 days after her 22nd birthday.

And this roller coaster of emotions comes from a person who was not even related to me.

Is it worth it?

I am not insensitive I am just being patience.

I said this sentence so many times, to a lot of people, in a lot of situations and for various reasons. Most of it so that they know they are about to push my patience to the limit. I prefer not to orally express my anger aggressively towards an individual, I would structure my sentence so that people would think twice to say things that they may regret saying. I guess the older I get the more I am prone not to act according to rage but more on being rational about it. Most people I encounter deal with their anger issue differently, such as taking up sports, find peace in religious activities, having the comfort of their love ones, and there are those who prefer physically abusing themselves, and others, which is a serious issue to be dealt with.

Every time that you feel like your are going to explode, take a step back, close your eyes, take a deep breath, count to 10, exhale and open your eyes. Then think again, is it worth it to lose your anger? 

Tantrum

I am not good at handling tantrum, because as far as I can remember I don't throw tantrum that much even when I was growing up. When I see children throw tantrum in public, I only imagine how the parents would feel, like Sue said "Never look, they are uncomfortable enough as it is". But when someone almost my age throws tantrum, I would say "Owh, please grow up". Throwing tantrum is of the way to seek for attention, it is  a desperate move of saying "Look at me! Look at me!" 

Skeleton in the closet

Everyone has something to hide, a shameful past, a painful present, or an unbearable future. I watched a television series the other night and the grandmother said "Not everything should be shared, that is why they are called secrets". Unfortunately, suppressing the secret is hard, it eats you alive to the extend for some you would consider an option that is taboo in every religion. However being upfront about the secret bears a more undesirable consequences.

A friend said every individual has his / her problems and challenges. You can just keep the skeleton in the closet or open the door wide open.Whatever it is a choice has to be made, once you have made it there is no turning back.  

Simple is the new black

I brought "bee" to a restaurant somewhere near where I work. I don't eat what they are serving, not because the food is not good, just it doesn't suit my palate. We ordered "Udang masak sambal petai", "ayam goreng kampung" and "sambal belacan", even though being a picky eater "bee" managed to clear all those dishes, so that is quite a benchmark for how good the food is. 

I have issues with what I eat since I was young, I don't eat vegetable because the color is green, I don't eat tempoyak, sambal belacan, budu, and all types of shellfish, I don't even go for "rendang" or curry. My mum often tease me, saying "Anak mat salleh celup". When I was growing up the simplest food my mum prepared was the best, she would do Butter Fried Rice, or just fried egg, over rice and 'kicap" , fried chicken or "tempe", that alone would have kept me contented the whole day.

Until now, rice with fried egg and soy sauce will triumph over all those delicacies. Like my friends always say "Hilang nikmat hidup", but like I always say "Ada aku kisah, it's my stomach not yours".   

p/s: To snuze, may & zue, get ready, since you guys like good food, I would love to bring you guys there "Restoran tepi kubur".. hehehe.

Men vs Women

Age old question...Usually who will win..*wink**wink*

Revenge of the mouse!!

Cat : O.M.G...Get away from me your are scaring me...get away..get away...get away...

Mouse : Bwahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!!! Get ready cat....It's revenge time!!!!


This is me with nothing better to do...hehehehehehe

Argh!!!!!

Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrgggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

This is me venting out over the things that happened last week and this week that push my patience to the max. I feel like climbing on top of the highest mountain and scream until my lung explode.

Owkey done. Slap a smile and go on with my day.