Final goodbye.

Saying goodbye is the hardest thing, it is true.

I received a phone call from Amir yesterday telling me that someone dear to me has passed away. There and then I froze in acceptance of the news. She was a student that was closed to me since the first day she entered college. I don't know why I was attracted to her, to her tenacity, to her determination, and the vivaciousness of facing the ups and down of her study. I guess because she approached me and seek my advice on how to excel in her study, how to build up her characters, of how to walk out of her shyness. Never once I heard, she used her illness as excuses of not attending classes, of not doing her assignments or participating in activities. She faced it day in and day out with a smile, always with a smile. Battling with acute anemia since she was born, she passed away a month shy of finishing her diploma and 10 days after her 22nd birthday. 

I went to pay my respect to her family in Malacca last night, along with some of her closest friends. I can't hold my tears when her mother started to tell me about her daughter's dream of becoming a doctor, and how her daughter knew that she won't be able to achieve it because of her condition, but it did not stop her from pursuing a career in forensic. The mother said that each night she prayed to Allah to make her daughter healthy again, so that she could pursue her dream, and finally after 22 years of praying so, she stopped and she prayed to Allah for the final time "Ya Allah, Kau lakukan ape yang terbaik pada anak ku, aku redha akan keputusannya". That evening at 4.30, she passed away without any complication.

I never cried so hard for a stranger, but when she walked into my life 3 years ago, she became a part of it. I usually complain when it is period pain, fever or flu, but I should be thankful instead that the pain is only temporary. She faced blood transfusion all her life since she was a baby, and always with a smile and lived her life to the fullest as if she was as healthy as anyone of us. She appreciated her life and what Allah has given her, her strength inspired others.

Her final text to me was a month ago, asking how I was, am I doing well, and when will we meet up again to hang out for drinks or just a chat and how much she misses me, and I replied "soon". Out of the busyness of work I forgot all about it, until last night, the only words that I can tell her was the recitation of "Surah Yassin", and that was my final goodbye.